When I heard this line from a show that I just watched, I just realized that I haven’t really taken the chance to say this to anyone (at least for the last 2 decades).

Why?

Because, aside from not wanting to play the blame game, I was too much of a people-pleaser.

I did not want to hurt anyone’s feelings; I did not want the other person to feel bad.

And that obviously didn’t do me well.

While I still never want to blame other people, I know now that calling someone out when necessary has to be done–out of love.

Because keeping quiet when I should have spoken up deprives the other person a chance to learn, grow, and become better.

Natakot ako eh. Pwede kasi silang magalit, tapos masasaktan ako, syempre.

Pero pwede rin pala silang makinig at maging willing na magbago.

Did I really believe that protecting others’ feeling could protect myself from getting hurt?

Yes, I foolishly believed that for so long.

And I wish I knew then what I know now:

Whether we speak up or we stay silent, getting hurt is an inevitable part of life.

It’s not something to be avoided at all cost.

Life taught me this the hard way: Avoiding pain prevents growth.

Natural naman sa tao ang matakot masaktan. Pero kapag kailangan, kakayanin.

I hope I will grow wiser–enough to determine not only when to speak and when to be silent, but what needs to be said and why.

💜

And I also hope that, in acknowledging the pain caused by others, I could also forgive–them and myself.

I hope I would also acknowledge the pain I may have caused others.

And from there, we could both heal and move forward freely.

🤍