Growing old is not always synonymous to growing up. I admit, hindi kasing bilis ng pagtanda ko ang pagmamature ko. Kaya naman pakiramdam ko, I have a lot of catching up to do.
But when I am finally starting to notice my progress, I am also having a higher tendency to become self-righteous.
And the Lord has been loving and merciful enough to give me a heads up and warn me about it before it becomes worse.
The ‘Red Flag’
I was chatting with one of my closest friends and we were talking about something else when I suddenly focused on one trivial detail that she mentioned, and I vented out my subjective opinions which I was not sure if she understood in the way I intended. But the conversation turned awkward for me as I found myself interiorly feeling defensive and beating myself up for being self-righteous at the same time.
After we finished chatting on a good note, I assessed myself and felt so awful because I allowed my emotions to speak for me instead of letting wisdom be my guide. I thought I could have been more cautious in choosing the words to say and the topics to deal with.
While it is good to do introspection, overdoing it and being too scrupulous could be due to my pride. And that is a ‘red flag’ that the Lord brought to my attention so we could do something about it.
True Wisdom Never Misleads
My brother was telling me the other day that as a person gains more knowledge and experience, he or she could also tend to become proud or even self-righteous. At parang tinamaan ako do’n kasi naisip ko, bago pa lang ako nagsisimulang matuto at mag grow spiritually, ramdam ko na yung danger ng pagiging prideful at pagiging ‘holier than thou’ along the way.
But the Holy Spirit knows where to lead me and what I need to know and be reminded of. I was reading the book of Wisdom in the Bible and the Lord reminded me that if I know and always remember that wisdom is from Him and that I can grow in virtue only because of His mercy and grace, it will humble me profoundly and genuinely.
And (segue ko lang) one of the resources that God has brought to mind is the book that contains lessons, quotes, and prayers about humility (Litany of Humility). This book is called, “How To Be Somebody” by M.V. Mendez. I hope and pray that this could also be a helpful resource to you. I have read only a few parts of this book. I am still yet to read further.
God’s Love Is Humbling
I am so grateful that God is so merciful to give me chances and opportunities to repent and be transformed by Him whenever He makes me aware of the matters that still need to be modified.
Pwede naman Niya akong i-reprimand nang isang bagsakan. Pero yung paunti-unting pagpapaalala at pagdidisiplina, that’s how He shows mercy. And that is also what He wants me to do to myself and to others–to be patient and compassionate.
At sa pagbibigay ng warnings, He would also remind me of His love… to be loved and be given mercy by the Almighty God is truly humbling. How He loves me is how I should also love others.
The Lord is the perfect model of a love that is bold, brave, kind, patient, and humble. And may being constantly aware of this make us grow wiser and humbler.
MY PRAYER FOR CONTINUOUS GROWTH AND HUMILITY
Lord, You have been prompting me and guiding me to grow closer to You,
and to gradually become like You in character and service.
I know that it is Your will and desire that I grow in holiness and virtue.
This is also what I desire and aim, Lord.
Help me, then to continue listening to Your voice, to heed Your promptings, to obey and follow You.
And for me to be able to do this, I ask that You grant me the grace to become authentically humble.
I thank You for Your gentle reminders whenever I become way too proud in the process.
May I continue to grow in Your love, grace, and wisdom. And make me humbler as I progress.
May all this bring You glory, praise, and honor.
I ask this in Your name, Jesus.
“The greater you are, the more you must humble yourself; so you will find favor with God.”(Sirach 3:18)
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